WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Home from the Hospital..Finally....

Let's hope I don't have to go back anytime soon. I'm still in an immense amount of pain from the surgery but I sure do love being back in my home. Being is in the hospital is so boring and lonesome. I can't tell you how relieved I am that I am here sitting in my own living room looking at my kitty cat whom I haven't seen in nearly 3 weeks. He's just looking at me and talking to me like "is there anything I can get you mommy?" He has been following me around like little puppy dog and everyone in a while he will say something but I just wish I could understand cat language. Maybe he is trying to speak English to me; I'm just not sure. I'm just so glad to be home and I've missed that bundle of fur so much. I loved seeing him on Skype; it was almost like I was back home in my own living room.

This was by far the longest stay I have ever had to endure in the hospital. It was just 2 days shy of 3 weeks. I didn't realize a block could constitute staying in the hospital quite that long. I almost got to stay a few hours longer when the pain erupted just as we were leaving. I was standing up just walking out and some of the nurses stopped us to ask some questions about my medication and the TPN I needed to bring home. We just were standing there for a little while and then all of a sudden I needed to sit down; tears were streaming uncontrollably out of my eyes as the knife like pains continued in my stomach. I felt just a fish being gutted right then and there. I can't get over how sore it is but I did just get cut open a little over a week ago and I still have staples that will need to be taken out next week.

This morning I got to yank out the JP tube. Check it just prior we were just scissoring the stitches and getting it ready for yank out. OMG it hurt like hell when she got it ready for me to this point where the white is hanging out. Awwww, damn it hurt like hell! I had to take a little break and then I started pulling and pulling and then I yanked out all the rest. A rubber tube being pulled right out of your insides is not at all that comfy or a great feeling to have feel; take it from me.

Well enough of the disgusting gross stuff; my husband I am have yet to figure out a schedule for my TPN. I need to be hooked up to it for 16 hours and then 6 hours off which mean 6 hours of total freedom from an IV. It's all about math and timing so that should get my chemo brain out of the dust and thinking. What will work best for both of us; what hours would I like to be free (and I only get 6 of them).

For now I am going to sleep in my own bed and enjoy being in my own house; helping myself to my refrigerator when ever I feel like it and going through a huge stack of mail; all the things you have to deal with when you are on vacation normally for an extended amount of time. Let's hope next time I have to go through such a huge stack of mail; my honey and I are on a great snowboard adventure in Colorado or somewhere awesome. Thank you all for your blessings, possitive thoughts and prayers. I am feeling much better and just enjoying being at hom with my family.

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8 comments:

Deb said...

I'm so glad to hear that you are home dearest Jayne. Your furry friends must be so ecstatic to have you back! They will be constatntly attached to you from now on! I know Angelina can't keep her paws away from me when I come back from being gone just a few hours!
I'm here and just a short drive away if you need anything - please just let me know! I'll bring you anything you want to eat as long as you can tolerate it...do not want to go against any restrictions!
Love you,
Debbi

l'optimiste said...

yay!! home at last. now just to get a bit fatter! :o)

heal well babe. thinking of you
x

WhiteStone said...

Glad to hear that you are home. And I told Tonto to speak gentle welcoming words to you. Wouldn't it be cool if we could understand them when they 'speak' to us?! Bless you.

Amy said...

hey there,

i sent you a text message yesterday, and debbi said you cant receive them! i called you a couple of times this morning and its going right to voicemail, so pelase give me a call when you are up to it and let me know how things are going!
fuzzy friends are surely glad to have you back, they are such lifesavers and the answer to lonlieness! id be lost without mine! im so glad you are home, i want to know when and where and how your chemo will work, and we can talk about me coming back up to hang out with you a couple of days, ok? ok! ill try to call you later! :) amy, dale, daisy, cally, cruiser and yukon! :) meow woof!

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy that you are finally home...I can't imagine spending that long in the hospital! I've been reading and following your latest journey with this cancer crap and I tell you - I am in AWE of you. Seriously. You are one tough chick! My wish for you is that you finally get some peace and time to heal without pain...
Sending positive thoughts your way, as always...
Becky

Daria said...

Oh man is all I gotta say ... glad you are home.

TC said...

I'm just an echo,
Glad you are home, you are one tough broad or chick or dame or just female.
Glad you are home with the animals (children).
KEEP up your spirits.

Dee said...

I'm happy to read that you are home.
Being home with my husband and dog was the best feeling in the world.
Hugs from NJ
Dee

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Disclosure

My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

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