What it takes to kick this disease...

That is probably the question of the century. I get so mad when I see all the money being wasted on a war with the wrong country that attacked us in the 1st place. The insane amounts of money being tossed away in a toilet in Iraq when there could be money being used for researching this terror called "Cancer". It is not something totally out of the question to solve; it is possible. How many more lives do we need to loose? Millions more? How about billions? I have made up my mind that mine is not going to be one of them! I have the will in my heart to keep on going even when it seems impossible; I can feel that inner strength inside me that tells me to never give up. I have so much hope in my heart that I can beat this. I also have too much to live for and so much to do with my life. It's not over yet!

Today I rode my bike and attempted to do some swimming laps in the pool but I just couldn't get over the fact that the pool felt cold even at 84 degrees. It could have been some of the slob that I was seeing in the pool along with with lots of hair?

I was also on the phone catching up with others for whom I have been so horrible at keeping in touch with. They now have AT&T and we can talk for free!) I missed my chance (to swim this weekend).

Blue Belle did amazing as she ran along side me on my monster bike; it kinda feels like a Monster now that I seem to be doing the balancing act on it. I'm so tiny and I bet it out weighs me by at least a hundred pounds.

Yesterday I did 7 laps around the complex on the bike with Miss Blue Belle and then swam 3 laps in the pool. I felt quite accomplished and my honey went to the hospital to pick up my Protonix (I ran out a few days ago) and since then have been puking up a storm at night and in the mornings. The Protonix seem to have not gotten enough into my system to take effect just yet.

It wasn't very pleasant for my honey to hear when he awoke yesterday. He was trying to be all romantic and then I ran for the toilet and started puking up a storm. How incredibly sad!( I felt like a total shit and I told him I did not feel like puking because he made me feel like puking because that is not at all the truth!(. I love that man with all of my heart and soul; so I took it personally when he tried to show affection towards me and that stupid puke just had to come out; I still ran for the toilet with my mouth covered. I puked out quite a bit, but it sucked because it was the wrong moment for it to happen! My Love understood completely. He felt bad for me and was worried. He called at lunchtime to find out what I needed and I did tell him that my prescription had run out. He did all the rest and went and got it for me!)

OK back to whey I didn't do any laps today in our pool. Well, our pool is more public and kids tend to bring up the bacteria level in a pool which can cause my kidneys and bladder to go ballistic with the infections. My doctors did warn me of this. I am planning to use the pool Tuesday - Thursday and the rest of the week I can just ride my bike; everyday will be exercise to get my body stronger. I am also going to try to eat as good as I can or best I can. I don't know how to just yet, because most of the time; I don't feel like cooking or cleaning up while cooking. It's kind of hard to do now. I just can't do any more shakes for a while; they nauseate me to no end and the texture is not working for me anymore; besides most shakes look like poo to me (they might as well taste like it too!(; I guess just the same as the black bean soup.

I'm taking a little break from them (for now) and will try to get my nutrients more so from the kid vitamins. Somehow I need to get more protein into my diet but I need to take a break from those shakes. I just can't stomach them any more!( Maybe I can sneak some protein powder in some food? Pancakes? Homemade breads? I don't know, but I do need to find a way and try to be creative.

Well I did take Miss Blue Belle with me to the vet today and Igot a second opinion on her teeth cleaning and the amount of weight she needs to loose. She must loose at least 5 lbs and then work from there. She is a larger Sheltie but she is turning into a little meatball!) I won't let it happen and we had to tell the cook at the pub that she is no longer to receive any more tri tip. I cut down on her food here and of course I have been exercising her and me like crazy these last couple of days. I still have to deal with pain daily and still getting those muscle spasms but just a few times a day. See that doesn't even stop me; I just have to time things just right with my system.

Tomorrow is the "Relay for Life" and I put together 3 boxes (they were cheaper than the baskets at Tuesday Morning!). I had some extra products from closing down my business (long story, not cut out for owning my own business or processing orders), but anyway I did have some extra products and decided to donate them for this charity event. I filled each of the boxes with bath Salts, Massage Oils, facial wash, moisturizers, teas, and even a mud body wrap; just spa products for each of these boxes which will be raffled off tomorrow.

I just spoke with another friend whom I haven't spoken to in months; anyway she has a daughter that is 4 and is a survivor of spinal and /or brain cancer who will also be doing the survivor walk with me and Blue Belle. I plan to take lots of photos and tomorrows update may not be until Sunday after the Farmer's Market! We will see!) Amanda is also walking the survival walk with me and we are also planning on attending the breakfast. I have to get it together my team is called the "Caped Cured Saders" so look out!) I may see many other friends tomorrow showing their support. It is a touching event and I can't wait to experience this with my Lover!)