WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Monday, May 4, 2009

A Responsible Thing to do for all of us...

I'm very proud of myself for doing one thing while at home. Actually it was 2 very important things. I created my "Last Will & Testament" and a "Power of Attorney". I didn't have to drive to see a very expensive lawyer, instead I got it done all online. I also saved quite a bit of money and it really did have to be done. I had literally been putting this off for years.

It was much more convenient and easier to do than I thought it would be. I don't know why but I always figured these things have to be complicated; but it really wasn't at all. All I have to do now is to get it notarized, have 2 witnesses sign and I'm done!)

I have been very lucky and blessed at the same time to have gone through what I have with a very strong Will to live. I hate hearing on the news about unlucky individuals who actually prove that sometimes it could possibly be out of our hands should a life be lost. I'm talking about victims in accidents or acts of violence. A life can be lost because of a selfish, hateful person who decides to take someone else's life or it could even be an accident, or even natural or health related; the responsible thing to do for your family and loved ones is to already have a Will or a Power of Attorney in place; this way loved ones don't have to suffer in the case that their own state decides to take over and claim everything that belongs to a family or just hold on to it for years and years while it has to get tied up in courts.

I don't know if this actually happens but the government has been extremely untrustworthy these past couple of years. Either way, I'm covered legally and now I don't have to worry about my honey getting screwed over by my own state government should something happen to me. (see I'm not totally convinced that I will die of Cancer) but it doesn't hurt to be prepared.

MY HEALTH UPDATE:

These past couple of days were a little easier but I still have had severe diarrhea and heartburn each and every day. I even started getting very painful spasms in my bottom that my honey had enough of me crying that I had to take a dreaded painkiller which did help lots.

I have even gained a few pounds and I hope to keep them on. The eating is getting a little easier by the day but overall the diarrhea accompanied with some really painful spasms is the worst of it right now. How unpleasant it is to have those sorts of pain!(.

Don't get me wrong, it's still wonderful to be alive and things could be much worse. I can at least be very thankful to be at home with my honey my pets, and that I can go outside on a walk and sometimes even drive to the store. At least these painkillers are working for this right now. I can't just sit there and suffer in pain and my honey is right about that. I was too busy being stubborn and just dealing with the pain by screaming and crying and then trying breathing exercises which did little to nothing besides annoy my honey. He had enough of that!

Well here was a wonderful laugh I got to have last night. While I was sitting on the couch in pain from going to the bathroom so many dozens of times when Tonto had enough and he cried for me to pick him up. He then slept in my arms for a little while and then when I put him down he just stretched out and napped while I watched movies. He was even snoring which really cracked me up until he woke up briefly, gave me a dirty look and then continued to nap out. Notice those big black toes!

I also found out a date in which to go back to work which should give me plenty of time to heal and to put some weight on my bony ass!) We are settling on the date of June 23rd. Mostly because of the kidney issue and the nephostomy bag and getting that removed. I don't know how long I will need to make sure that my bowels and kidneys are healed but I feel that 2 weeks should be long enough to heal. We will see. Also, I don't have any clothes my size currently and I refuse to buy any because I know they will be too small next week or the week after; so what's the point?

We had a nurse come by to change my dressing on my nephostomy tubes today and she found that the reason my heartburn has been so god awful is because I had been getting something for that in my feeding bag and also in the IV in the hospital. Now I am receiving nothing and the stomach acids have building up and causing severe pain. She called my doctor right away and he immediately prescribed Pantoprazole. My honey went and picked it up for me right away. Let's hope this works!)

I do notice that when I go out to the grocery store, instead of men looking at my boobs;(sometimes it happens and I just ignore = no big deal!) well now they are looking directly down at my nephostomy bag which most of the time is covered nicely with a scarf. I bet it's really sexy and perhaps it's also quite stylish I suppose. Maybe they have pee fetishes? Just kidding; but I don't really know what others think of it or feel when they see it; I hope that they see in it that I am a survivor of some sort and they should be incredibly grateful that their kidneys or body parts work. I had taken Miss Blue Belle to the doggie park and noticed a few people looking at it and I had it covered beautifully with a scarf that matched. Now I am going to have scarves that match Blue Belle too!

I don't mind at all wearing the annoying thing in public if it does this to others. I sport it around proudly and even decorate it so that it matches what I happen to be wearing that day. Blue Belle will get to wear matching scarves. I think my brother knows how to make them and he's visiting next month!

Even if this stupid nephostomy bag is still in place when I do return to work; I won't be embarrassed at all. My loving co-workers wouldn't even care or notice - instead, they notice my spirit most of all. I just hope and pray that I get to ride my new roller blades, bike, to swim, and most of all snowboard this coming winter season! For now it's walking with my dog, cat, and hubby!)

8 comments:

SleightGirl said...

Awww...your kitty is so cute!

I hope you feel better soon.

l'optimiste said...

oi CJ! Take the painkillers! Being in pain is using valuable energy that is better spent on your body getting well.

I still have everything crossed for your swift recovery - oh, and I have an extra 6 pounds on my butt I wish i could donate to you ;o)

we did the Will thing a while ago too. As you say, better to be prepared. I didn't enjoy the experience much I must say! But it's done now. Yuck.

Love that cat! Too cute
x

R.DaLomba said...

You are a hero. You are very strong and I admire the fact that you have a sense of humor through this. I can't say that I can relate to you, but I went through so much with my twins who both have Cystinosis and had kidney transplants. 11 years of gtubes,vomiting,diarrhea, not eating, med mixing, idiot nurses. Well, you know better than anyone else. But making them laugh got us through it. God bless you. You are an ispiration and I wish you the best.

Lynn said...

We can't wait to have you back in the carpool... nephrostomy bag and all!

Best to you and your family :-)

mischa

TC said...

Glad all is going well, hope the heartburn lets up. Good for you doing the will and testament and the poa, it is the responsible thing! You obviously need the painkillers and like l'optimiste said the pain takes away from the healing. It's all good, you are with your husband and pets and hopefully will get to go to work soon. Kitty does have big pads on his paws but he is COMFY. Glad to have you home!!

Holly (haynes94( said...

I agree! We made new wills and POA's before my last surgery. It is a responsible thing to do!

PS-- It's haynes94 from Inspire.

nat said...

I am certain that you are starting a new fashion trend. I'll let you know when it reaches the midwest... :)

You are doing great - keep up the weight gain!

Generic Protonix said...

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Disclosure

My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

The contents of this blog including all images, (except images from third parties) and the name "Shopping Kharma - what comes around goes around" belong and copyrighted to C. Jayne Armstrong 2008-2010
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