WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Nothing wrong with laughter...

I had quite a busy day today because I got my Costco run complete thanks so much to another loving neighbor. We kind of helped each out by providing one another with another great day. I got to be a mom for a day and watch her daughter (14) and in turn for her; her daughter is out having a blast with me (she gets to come home and tell her how much fun she had). I had my Costco list that I made on Sunday while I was waiting to see a doctor about my Bladder infection (it's much better now!). We had a list to stick by and both of us suffering from chemobrain can get a bit distracted with out a list to remember all that is really needed within a household (no excuses for getting off the list!).

I'm proud that we stayed on the list so much because we had to go through the entire store and we got 75% through the store (empty cart) when we finally found just 1st thing on the list (NO - we did NOT go from 1-10 on the list). We got through entire the store with out any distractions - "what's on the list!". It worked and I am glad to say we only got 1 extra thing (canned white and green tea flavored with natural blue berries and pomegranate!) with the exception of 2-3 things (on the list = we didn't get!) that we felt we could live without for now.

Towards the end of the shopping trip; Amanda found a 3 pack of mascara (have never even considered that I would ever need that much) and decided then that she would use her allowance to buy this 3 pack of mascara. Now, Amanda has the most beautiful long eyelashes that I am totally jealous of. I could only dream of having fabulous eyelashes like those that just doesn't at all need to accentuated in any way shape or form. Mine are so thin and light (not dark like hers with that little bit of blond on the very, very tips which makes them all the more fabulous!). I don't feel that mascara could ever produce those kinds of results and to need a 3 pack of crappy mascara (sorry it just didn't look at all appealing to me to spend that much on mascara - one at a time please?) and for who? Definitely, Definitely not Amanda!

Well anyway I got to do what I have always dreamed of doing with a daughter; we went to a super duper girley Beauty Supply shop and just had an absolute blast! It was make-up shopping for Amanda for the very first time & me the millionth time. I could totally remember being that age and picking out make-up for the first time with my mom. We called her mom and told her that this was her reward for helping me with the Costco shopping trip that has been so long over due (laundry detergent, dishwasher fluid, TP, catlitter, etc). I can't lift heavy things still and my honey had house repair shopping to do. It was perfect and of course Amanda loves the opportunity to just go shopping.

It's that age 14, of just starting to wear make-up? Yeah, I was that age once and I got my first mascara and lipstick at that age; even got my ears pierced and Amanda's has had her's since forever? No eyeshadow for me! My mom was always convinced that I had this beautiful natural shading around my eyes and there was no need to cover that up! Yes, we looked at all the beautiful shades and my mom said "NO!" after all that looking. Amanda has that (natural shading) too, but she's a kid and just wants to play! It used to be dolls and stuffed animals, now it's make-up and the process of discovering herself. That's what being a teenager is all about. Everyone deserves to enjoy this time no matter what and we certainly did!)

We asked the clerk about child safe make-up, of good quality, fun for kids to play with or teenagers, hypo-allergenic and of course the consult of getting the right colors for her skin (a choice of several colors and varieties) that would work well for her and of course her clothing ensemble. It was fun for both of us as the sale was "Buy 2, Get 2 Free!" We both got to pick a few things and her own make-up bag which was on the "Clearance" shelf. It was the most fun we had both had in a long time (months).

We got home and relaxed and then I took her home by 6pm. We walked Blue Belle and Tonto and her mother invited us all in. Amanda went out for a swim with her friends and neighbors at the pool while me and her mother talked about the day and my health. Tonto and Blue Belle enjoyed walking around a new place (Tonto was having an absolute blast!) to explore. We had some good conversation, laughing, making jokes, and then we both needed to start our evening. I should have used her restroom before I left, but I got greedy and just wanted to go in my own bathroom (not stink up my neighbor's bathroom).

I had hard a time trying to capture Tonto on the way out as he did not walk right up to me as usual when I called his name. He wanted to stay and enjoy all the new areas of this different house to sit and relax, to play with a bug in the corner; he just did not want to leave. He would crawl under a chair where I couldn't reach him. I finally got him in the corner after he had mutilated the little spider / mosquito looking thing in just seconds (I don't know what those bugs are called!). They can be everywhere and Tonto has already killed all the ones at my house (haven't seen one in years).

Well, we got outside and I was standing up and proceeded walking; my intestines started to feel as if they were a heap of mass that just wanted to fall into a pile at the bottom of my peritoneal cavity. I all of sudden had the urge that I really had to go to the bathroom and Tonto (he's really hard headed) is on his leash and a walk is not a walk with out circling the pool. That's his walk and his only walk; I can tug and pull him along the way to keep him from wanting to walk behind bushes and stuff; but he usually leads the way where he wants to go. He's stubborn that way. (I know this is an old video but some new readers may have never seen = it's half of his whole walk on video!)

Amanda's mother needed to get her mail and on our way back; I had to sit down and gather my intestines (so that I didn't shit my pants = it was about to happen), we got up and then I had to sit back down again. Amanda's mother asked if Tonto was being bad; he wasn't; he was enjoying peeing in the bushes while I lay there trying NOT to shit my pants. I told her "no, my intestines are acting up", they were, just didn't like the way "I'm just trying not to shit pants" would sound like if I actually said it to her; "my intestines are acting up" seemed a little less nasty or disgusting? It didn't happen just yet; I had it under control and finally when I walked another 25 feet closer to my unit, I tried to sit down again then it started to come out. I was like "great,!" and then I relaxed as I felt "it's not the end of the world!" no big deal; I can just clean myself up after my intestines go bazzerk. (I would have made it if only Tonto didn't have to circle the entire pool)

Once I got inside; I did what I needed to do; since my honey and Amanda had already unloaded the Costco goods; I could finally begin doing all that backed up laundry. We have been backed up for days and days; I suppose!). I got to take my nice hot bath, changed and then started the much needed laundry. Oh, I also smoked a bowl from my water pipe to get rid of the pain from my intestines; had an awesome laugh at myself that I shit my pants (just outside my home) finally!

My honey had gone to the local pub to watch another Stanley Cup Game (Go Chicago!). When my honey returned, I told him that I shit my pants and he was so sympathetic to me and I laughed and told him; hey's it's funny, I can laugh about it and I don't have a problem at all. I'm alive BABY! We had the perfect evening together; doing the laundry, watching TV, folding clothes and taking them and putting them away during the commercial breaks! More awesome times spent together!) Just gotta enjoy life and right now we are enjoying it together!)

UPDATE: I finally signed up for the Relay for Life in my town near West San Jose (Campbell) and am going to try to fundraise although I am terrible at it. Please DO Feel free to purchase your luminaries so that they can be seen here in Campbell, CA for those you love or have been affected by Cancer!

Here is my personal page for those interested:

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

The contents of this blog including all images, (except images from third parties) and the name "Shopping Kharma - what comes around goes around" belong and copyrighted to C. Jayne Armstrong 2008-2010
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