WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Friday, May 1, 2009

He does all the shopping...

It's been nice to be able to eat again but I am suffering from the side effects of waking up a dormant intestinal system and suffering from lots of diarrhea. Well I also lost 1/3 of my intestines so there's less time or less space to get through. The first night of eating (I had some "Brown Cow" yogurt and my sweet neighbor made me some cream of chicken soup) I had diarrhea all night long and then Wednesday all day long. It seemed as if each time I stood up; I had to go to the bathroom. My poor bottom has hurt like crazy. Hell it still hurts!(

Since we have been having this stupid "Swine Flu" outbreak (we have a few positive in my own town and neighborhood) and our neighborhood being so diverse; I am not allowed to shop across the street at our ghetto Safeway. No way! What do I think of this Swine Flu? I think it's crap that the media is scaring and stressing us out when we really don't need it right now; isn't loosing jobs and companies shipping our jobs overseas enough? There are barely 100 cases maybe, and how many people are dying everyday of cancer? Too many to count I'm sure...

Well that doesn't stop my honey from trying to protect me. He went to the store wearing his gloves and then had to go to "Rite-Aid" for more butthole medicine for me. He is so wonderful to me. Now it doesn't phase him at all. He will go over and get anything I wish to get. At first asking him to get such things embarrassed him and he was convinced that everyone there, must have thought he was gay because it seemed that he was always going there for a few common things like beer and butthole stuff.

He has purchased many stool softeners, suppositories, laxatives, enemas, and even one of those huge red rubber douche bag things with some "KY Jelly". That was a very hillarious spat we had but overall he did it and now he never ever complains. It's just the miracle of me being alive that gets him through such obstacles. At least we can laugh and get through this.

I had diarrhea for most of yesterday and then the heartburn started. It was pretty brutal. All night long I suffered in pain of getting up and going to the bathroom. at all hours of the night I had more diarrhea and then some vomiting. It was quite miserable. All night long, I would run some hot water in the bathtub and just fill mostly the bottom so that my nephostomy tubes did not get wet on my back. It's such a process of having to unhook the nephostomy bag before taking off my underwear or pants. That too is getting on my nerves!

I can't wait until my intestines and body get healed. This is hard and it has been quite painful to endure. I can honestly say that I have weaned myself off of all painkillers (no painkillers for 2 days) and right now just bearing and putting up with the pain. I was told that I needed to do this by my doctor; so I did. No arguments there!)

I also called a dietitian this morning in order to find out what I should do about this horrible, horrible heartburn and of course the diarrhea that I have been having. OK I did do one thing stupid that I can at least laugh about. I did not want plain white bread and instead I requested sour dough. I ate about 2 slices of toasted bread yesterday and perhaps this is what caused my heartburn? It kinds feels like that might be what caused it? Well, when I called, I couldn't get in touch with one; just a regular advice nurse. She did tell me that a dietitian will be calling soon and will follow her advice on what I need to eat to stop this severe diarrhea. It seems that every time I stand up, I feel the urge to go. It sucks!( I am eating some yogurt and feeling a little better; just the darn diarrhea!(

I have a very important doctor's appointment this morning which will determine when I can go back to work and when things are expected to get back to normal. I know I am healing and learning many valuable lessons a long the way about foods and my digestive system. It's all about getting used to it and it getting used to different foods. I will need to feel and understand my body once again. I will do everything in my power to heal; that's my ultimate goal.

I just got back from my doctor's appointment and it went well. I can take anti-diarrhea medicine and heartburn medicine. It is preferred that I go the all natural route for pain (in so many words = it's what works and won't mess up system). He took out the pick line and looked at my wound on my tummy. No more packing the wound, just Neosporin and gauze. It should heal much more quickly. (Forgot to get my doctor's note for work!(

In about 2 weeks I should be contacted by radiology to see about getting a stint put and getting rid of that darned Nephostomy bag. He told me that it might not be possible because of the cancer, scar tissue or the possibility that it might have accidentally become closed up from the surgery (stitches). In that case I would need to wear it for a while and then a urologist would try to help me. I still lots of hope and will think and feel positive that it can be fixed. It doesn't do any good worrying about it. I am still very thankful that I get to spend my days with my honey.

Also I had a nutritionist call and analyze my situation and she recommended all kinds of foods and the BRAT diet for which young children are often on when they have diarrhea.
B = Bananas, R = Rice, A = Apple Sauce, T = Toast

That sounds simple enough and I can also do soups but nothing with fiber. No fiber at all. For now I plan to relax on the couch, watch some TV and try this snacking as much as I can. I am off lockdown for now. My immune system is a bit strong and I can go out in public and I celebrated by doing some grocery shopping (not at the Ghetto Safeway but at a Raley's store close to my neighborhood. I was happy to be able to do that, but once I got home the severe diarrhea continued and my bottom is burning like hell. It's painful and I will be doing something for the pain; it's absolutely rediculous (smoking a joint!). I'm legal here and will not allow myself to suffer needlessly. My doctor doesn't want me to take any more prescription painkillers because of my system just waking up. This medicine is OK by him!) It's funny how the law is but I do have faith that my President would never allow for me to be put in jail for ridding myself of needless pain when my options are this low.

We were a bit panicked over the whole Swine Flu scare and I don't appreciate the media scaring us like this. It made the front page of the San Jose Mercury News many days in a row with scary, scary headlines. My new name for my local newspaper is now the "San Jose Bad News". If the news is not bad, they will not print it. What is it with just focusing on bad news? It's really wacky how they run with these stories and a lot of people are gullible and I saw our very own Vice President being very gullible (he does make me laugh and I love him for that! Bless his heart!) and then the President; he's so very cool, calm, and collected; he always seems to calm me down; it's not so bad = no worries. He has it under control. Even down to the tone of his voice which calms me therapeutically every time and I love it. I'm one who definitely does not need stress or fear.

That last President; that's what he was all about; stressing us out but not really knowing what to do about it, except make up new stupid words; acting the job and not doing. I really don't understand those who feel the need to stress over the sky falling when they should be out enjoying the blessed day that they have been given. Everyday really is a blessing and there really is no need for stressing out over needless things. Why be scared all the time of terrorist attacks? I can't imagine what that must do for nerves always stressing like that. What about getting cancer or some other deadly diseases or just being thankful that you don't have one? None of us really know when our last day will be but we really do have to make the most of right now. I know I say this all the time but I truly believe in it!)


Kiwi Riverman - The Writer said...

And I thought having a couple of skin cancers was an issue? I hope things improve for you. I keep having biopsies because my face wasn't healing.

TC said...

I hope you are feeling better? I know it's nothing to compare but I get heartburn when my body is out of whack. Can you eat yogurt? Kudo's to your honey for going shopping for you, mine doesn't like to do it but he will go get me "girly" things if it's an emergency which makes me very proud of him. I'm proud of you for no more painkillers too.

R.DaLomba said...

It's wierd when my daughters had the runs after kidney transplant, they had them on fiber.

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

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