WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Not all nurses are 1 in the same....surgery success!!

Well this little cute photo reminded myself of me being examined and prepped for my surgery today! LOL! It sure would be cool if my butthole lit up like that!)

Today and yesterday's morning shift nurse (same nurse) was very frustrating for me to have to deal with; she often interrupts me in the middle of what ever I have to say as if what I have to say isn't important enough to listen to or maybe I'm not intelligent enough since I'm just a patient or just a human pin cushion; but definitely beneath her status as an RN. She is of Asian descent and I think she is Korean but not all Korean are like her; I have had experiences with others like her like the one upstairs on the 4th floor who also refused to give me pain medication when I needed it.

When ever I try to explain to the nurse what I need; she ignores me by messing with the IV until it starts beaping while I am talking or flat out interrupts me by talking with someone else on the phone; it drives me crazy when trying to explain things (that are important to my health) and nothing really gets through to her because she refuses to listen to me. Her English is a bit broken and sometimes I can't understand her or if she is even talking to me or to herself?

I must say that sometimes this nurse does not seem to be very competent with her job or dealing with a full deck; but she tries some of the time to help out. Her nick name is Liar Liar; and she likes to weasel out of doing certain unpleasant job duties; now she will do vitals and give out some medications, but nothing like changing the bed or helping my change clothes (for surgery), emptying my urine collection hat, or unhooking me from the NG tube. I do know that she does not prefer to get dirty; that's why she won't empty my urine (I have to do it) cap (most nurses do that but she will not do it). It's not really supposed to be the patient's duty to empty their own urine hat but when this nurse is on duty I always have to or else it will over flow. I have also been having keep track of how much I pee for her and she is never appreciative that I even do that. I do know that the nurses are responsible for measuring patient's output (from the urine cap); so I decided to ask her point blank if I could just get rid of the cap and just pee in the toilet like a normal person with out having to worry about touching that icky cap. In her broken English she told me that I have to keep it in there; so I asked her; so when are you going to empty it? I don't like having to change it either. Hell she at least gets to wear gloves while emptying it? She then gets on the phone and calls the other nurse to come and do it for her. This woman is definitely not a team player as I see it.

Another annoying thing that she does is leaving trash in my bed (alcohol wipes, plastics from syringes, etc.); I try to gather the trash as she drops it and will call for her to grab it and throw it in the trash but she will often put in in a pile as she is flushing my IV and then just forgets to pick it up to throw it in the trash; so sometimes I will mysteriously wake up with plastic and trash stuck to my body or on face and little pieces of alcohol paper in my bed. It was kind of annoying.

She totally ignored my request for pain medication (now she was good at getting me anything else except for pain medication; that she had a serious problem with) when I really needed it yesterday; I was in such severe pain and had even been crying from the pain in my abdomen and in my back (kidneys); it was definitely a level 8 pain; the PCA pump had not been set up yet and was taking a little while from the Pharmacy and their slow paperwork.

The doctors had approved that I should be able to get pain injections into my IV until the PCA pump arrives (it was due to arrive in a few more hours) but she would not do such a thing. Instead she brought me one Fentanyl patch. She unpeeled the patch (now a Fentanyl patch will take 24 hours to take effect; by no means is it immediate pain relief). She pealed the plastic and placed the plastic coating on my chest and not sure what she did with the actual medicine part of the patch = sticky part). After about 2 hours of horrid pain and still no pain relief; the PCA pump finally arrived. I was so relieved when it did arrive. I hate having to suffer for hours in pain and I had to do it once before with another nurse on the 4th floor. I was finally able to catch up on the pain. When the PCA pump finally arrived she acted as if she did a major favor for me and that what fast service she provided me for my pain (I had been suffering for 2 hours).

The 2nd shift nurse had arrived around 3:30pm (I was so happy to see her) and she was amazing compared to this morning shift nurse. If I needed anything; she was there and even very thoughtful at thinking of things that I might need. Now that is the kind of nurse I always admire and never ever take for granted. A nurse such as Emily (not her real name); makes me want to be a nurse.

Emily came into my room a few hours later with 2 pain patches with a combined strength of 150mg of Fentanyl patch? (what is the correct terminology for this?) Anyway, in order to place those particular patches on me; we really had to locate where Liar Liar had placed her patch; if not; I could easily overdose on the medication so it was very, very important that we locate this other patch. As loopy as Liar Liar was, perhaps she had put the patch on herself.? just makes me wonder.

We looked all over my body; everywhere, my ass, my butt cheeks, back, neck, throat, chest, legs, in both trash cans, in the bathroom; I mean everywhere. We tore the bed apart and even went through my hospital gown piece by piece only to find that piece of plastic that is often stuck to a Fentanyl patch.

I thought I had pulled something sticky off in the bathroom earlier that was on my chest but it turned out to be just one of those snappy white square things for measuring my heart rate. We continued to look in the trash some more; the floor, under the bed; everywhere we could possibly think of; no patch anywhere. (we were totally using great teamwork something Liar Liar completely lacked!).

The piece of plastic that we found from the patch that was inside my gown kind of looked like it had been written on (date & initials)? We both figured it out together. This nurse had stuck a worthless piece of plastic on me instead of the medication. Now how foolish can she be? She really did not want me to get any pain medication. I deserved to suffer in pain as far as she was concerned.

Well I was unfortunate enough to have Liar Liar again for my nurse this morning. I did get to ask her point blank "where did you stick that Fentanyl patch on me yesterday?" (This is the actual Fentanyl Patch that she had tried to claim ownership of= I distorted the signature in order to protect privacy but this patch is on my right upper arm) She looked on my chest and then she pointed to my arm where the other nurse had clearly signed her initials and said "right there!" I was astounded that she lied right there and she then said "I placed it right there" thinking I was dumb enough to believe her. I asked her; "Now are those your initials?". She tried to say "yes", but then I told her; "those are not your initials, I watched Emily write her own initials right there". "I even watched her place those patches right here and we could not find anywhere on my body, on my bed or anywhere where you placed that Fentanyl patch on me yesterday; we looked everywhere for it".

Of course she kept trying to interrupt me several times and I kept having to tell her to just let me finish or "please stop interrupting me; that's very rude of you. I will give you a chance to speak when I am done giving you my point." I showed her the piece of plastic that looked like it had some writing on it. I think she may have realized right then that I just caught her in her lie and then tried to change the subject by talking and moving really fast as if she didn't have any time to waste. She told me; you must have removed it because I did place that patch on you. There was just no way around it. This woman has no integrity what so ever (that is the number one thing that I am in love with my husband for is his integrity) and she did everything in her power to try to prove me wrong that I must have pulled the patch off myself which I never did. She continued to act as if she didn't do anything wrong? No apologies what so ever for lying; she didn't do anything wrong.

I also asked her why did you make me wait so long to give me pain medication when it was approved by the doctor? "You gave me a piece of plastic for my pain instead of an injection?" She continued to tell me that she did when in fact she did not; must more lies; that all I could get out of this nurse. No answers; she just ignored me and pretended that nothing at all was happening. In fact as I was talking to her and asking her those very questions; she walked right out of the room as if I was not even talking to her; grabbed her phone and started talking to someone else? How very, very, very strange. Can we say loopy? I couldn't help but think that she must be wearing that Fentanyl patch herself or saved it for herself.

No stressing about this although I have always been fascinated by the Psychology of people and why they do the things that they do. I have always admired many nurses and their selfless attitudes towards their patients. I love nurses who give it their all; those who are not so concerned about trying to cover their asses over lies as this one (Liar Liar) does. I have some truly wonderful nurses here; this is just one bad apple out of a bunch of sweetie pies that needed to be called out. I was hoping that this experience might enlighten her or help to change her ways.

I knew that I have had her before and I vaguely remember a very nightmarish experience with her. Yes she was the very same nurse that had treated me like a human pin cushion. It appears that she has never changed her old habits. Back then I tried to teach her a lesson that patients are Human Beings with feelings just like herself and that in order to be a good nurse she needs to try to place herself in the position of the patient and how would she feel if she were treated in that way? While I was trying to go back in time; I was also reminded of the unkempt nurse who did a stinky fart in my room (this all happened right after my 5th abdominal surgery).

As I was working on this very blog entry, nurse Liar Liar (I won't use her actual name in order to protect her identity); there really are so many wonderful nurses here with hearts of gold in this very hospital and sometimes she can be nice and thoughtful at times; I will give her that. She's just a bit high strung and doesn't think a whole lot about her actions or how she treats others besides herself in most situations; she can be a bit selfish. Anyway to get back to my point, it was time for me to wheeled into surgery for my right ureter stint replacement. I had to get naked for surgery (out of my t-shirt and comfy pants) She didn't want to touch my nasal gastric tube so I had to unhook that myself unlike the other nurses and I also unhooked myself from the IV as well.

I was completely naked when Liar Liar barged into my room to act like she was helping me get changed. She left the door and curtain wide open for all to see Jayne's naked body. I had to hurry to put on the huge ass hospital gown for surgery and I had it all under control only her supervisor must have been close by so that must have been why she totally came into my room leaving the door and curtain wide open for all to see my skinny, scrawny naked body and a couple even walked on by my room looking inside at me naked trying struggle to getting dressed. I lost it and yelled at her and told her to please close the door and she just barely touched the curtains at all still not even closing them enough but that door had to stay wide open? I could see her laughing at me and I was pissed. Oh I was mad. I walked over there naked and slammed the door; I didn't care that her stupid computer was there in the hallway blocking the door from being closed. I then told her to please just get out of my room and stop trying to exploit me. "I don't want the whole hospital to see my naked body; so please stop it and please just get out of my room so that I can get dressed!".

I hated having to be rude to her but enough is enough. She completely ignored me and opened the door again and I closed it again; "get out now!" It's just not in my nature to be that way unless my buttons are pushed in such a way. This nurse seems to have absolutely no shame in showing off my naked body to the whole hospital but I honestly am not an exhibitionist , nor do I wish to and to be paraded down the hospital naked! It was crazy awkward to have to go through that. I normally don't get that irate but this was ridiculous. She seemed to think it was funny and I know she was doing it purely for her entertainment which was not cool at all.

This woman would not listen to anything that I had to say; I asked her to close the door "Please" and she refused to and she still would not leave my room. She insisted on standing behind my naked body while I was trying to put on that stupid gown where my ass was just hanging out and of course she had to grab a gown that had no straps to hold the ass together; only straps that held the neck together and she still drove me crazy choking me and also getting my hair caught in the straps as she tried to tighten the strings around my neck. I finally had enough of her rough handling and pulled the strings away from her and then secured the gown myself. I told her again to please get out of my room so that I can do this!; "I can't do this with you in here getting in my way" and she was totally getting on my nerves. She told me not to worry that I would only be on the bed the entire time. She kind of talked to me condescendingly. She was also laughing at me each time I got mad at her. I was floored. I definitely don't want this nurse ever again. I don't even want to see her!(

A nice male nurse arrived shortly after to help push my bed to the surgery area which was also on the 2nd floor. Liar Liar tried to help guide the gurney and as we were heading to surgery; this one nice nurse had an armful of bags and she walking down the hall and Liar Liar appeared to go out of her way to nearly knock the poor girl down as we proceeded down the hall. She refused to slow down for her; just practically ran over the poor girl. No apologies what so ever; just kind of little laugh and we preceded on; I was a bit shocked and I hope the poor woman didn't get hurt because it didn't look so good. The male nurse behind me pushing my gurney was a little shocked too.

Anyway we made it to surgery OK with no one else getting hurt (she sure hit bumps pretty hard almost catching air a few times). I noticed that once we got to the surgery waiting area that the other nurses were also having problems with Liar Liar. OK that's her name. She refused to follow some protocols that were starting to slow down the processes in the surgery room from what I was gathering. I guess it seems that she's still up to her old tricks. Sorry to go on and on about this nurse but I am now laughing over it all now in good spirits. I'm definitely not laughing about that poor woman in the hall that she nearly ran over; it looked like she could have sprang her ankle or got run over by the gurney. It was the coldest thing I have ever seen done in a hospital. I am somewhat over some of the stupidity that Liar Liar was displaying right in front of me.

Well the coolest and by far the best part of my day was when I awoke after a very successful stent surgery to most beautiful sound I could ever dream of hearing. It was the sound of my husband's voice and his presence right next to me. I nearly cried because I was so happy to see him and so happy that I will be able to pee normally for right now. The surgery was a success and the smiles were never ending for me. Now we have another surgery tomorrow to insert a gastric tube which should help some with my stomach blocks. I hope this isn't a mistake and pray that this will work. I hate having more foreign objects inside my body; but my doctor did say that I could still snowboard with this contraption on. OH, and what about hot tubs? I love getting into hot tubs on romantic get a ways with my honey. There is still a chance that he will not be able to insert this contraption. Here is the old one and what a story that was getting it removed.

My honey and I got to Skype last night and it was awesome to see my honey and my cute pets. I just had to treat you all to Tonto's cute face. Must see Tonto each day. He has a different expression every day. He even made some cute little cries when my honey picked him up that just melted my heart. OMG! He sounded and just looked so incredibly cute! I just wanted to squeeze his compact soft frame. What a cute kitty he is and that mind of his own cracks me everyt ime. You never know what that boy is thinking sometimes. Sometimes I will see him really into something that is incredibly interesting to him as he bats and takes off running and tossing into the air my honey's rubber bands for his hair. I hope we don't get a shortage of them anytime soon because we both use them.

OK, now it's time for me to be sappy about my honey because I love him more than life itself. Being able to Skype with my honey is kind of like being in my own dining room looking at the gorgeous floor that he had put in for my birthday. How did I find such a wonderful man? Even though I am suffering horribly from this debilitating disease that I hope one day I will beat; having him in my life makes it all worth the fight. He makes me want to live, to try harder, and to be the best person that I can be. He is with out a doubt perfection of the man that I had always dreamed of being married too. It sucks that we can't have kids of our own but we do have each other and our pets which makes us happy.

Not being able to have kids is definitely not the end of the world for us. I would not wish to raise a child under the circumstances that we are faced with. If I ever want to be around kids, Blue Belle is my child magnet. I always seem to have wonderful little moments on some days where kids just come right up to me and love on my dog. It's so beautiful to witness and that's enough for me. I get my kid fix because some kids can be very cute and sweet. Some are mean too and I have seen Blue Belle on many occasions become very tolerant of a child kicking her, grabbing and jerking her hair, or smacking her. Yes, kids have done that to her and it is shocking when it happens especially when she is wearing her working dog vest. The parents are usually quick to come up and get their child away from my dog. I did get to show the child who had walked up to her and smacked on her little furry bottom (I have blogged about this incident before) have gone through ultimate tests of love and sacrifice; we always appreciate every day that we get to spend together. Those little moments that I get to spend with him; even on Skype are priceless.

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nat said...

I'm so glad the stent surgery was successful!!

I'll bet that nurse used the patch on herself. She sounds like a drug addict, who gets her *fix* from sick patients. I feel badly for you, and any other patients who aren't getting the proper medications because of her. That makes me SO ANGRY. Maybe you should file a complaint?

Good luck with the tube! It would be great for those blocks not to pose an issue for you anymore!

POD said...

Having to deal with Nurse Liar at this point in time is NUTTY. Please ask to speak to a patient advocate or the hospital social worker so you can get that nurse away from you. This woman should not be dealing/around patients in pain. And laughing at you...

Does the doctor ever come in and ask you what's happening? Do you discuss this stuff with them?

At least you are over this surgery hurdle for now. Hope you feel better soon. Nurse Liar needs a wakeup call.

Shopping Kharma said...

Well as nutty as nurse Liar Liar acted; I bet we would have found that missing pain patch on her had we looked. I did speak with patient relations yesterday and then somehow got her again this morning; then spoke with the charge nurse and Liar Liar wanted to talk to me and insisted against her bosses wishes; she still came in to my room to talk to me; I was point blank with her; "I just don't trust you, you failed me when I needed pain medication most by giving me just a piece of empty plastic to relieve my pain so of course I do not trust you. Did you know that Fentanyl patches take 24 hours to take effect?" Well of course she was not aware of that (another lie). I had to ask her to please leave my room because she just stood there staring at me blankly. I hate being mean to someone; its just not in my nature but I will stand up for what I believe in. I don't feel she was in her right mind to be taking care of me.
Thank you all for your prayers and good thoughts; here's to another successful surgery today!

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

The contents of this blog including all images, (except images from third parties) and the name "Shopping Kharma - what comes around goes around" belong and copyrighted to C. Jayne Armstrong 2008-2010
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