Preparing to go home...

My tentative dates to go home are either tomorrow (Thursday) or Friday. More than likely Friday and I will be getting home nurses to come and check on me and make sure my husband and I are doing things correctly.

Well evidently there will lots to be learned tonight on how to clean myself and take care of all the contraptions that I will need to care for. I have an IV pole and unit that all needs to be learned about tonight at 8pm. My honey will be educated on everything on how to take care of me. He is taking his "Family Medical Leave" tomorrow afternoon. He will be home for a whole month taking care of me.

I have my own feeding tube and the food itself (comes in huge white bags) needs it's very own shelf in the refrigerator (which is currently cleaning out). I have to go through a whole bag each day and they have it where I get about 6-8 hours of freedom (not being hooked up to the IVs) in a 24 hour day. That will be nice!) I can work my way down from there as I improve more and more each day. I might get to start liquids like next Monday or Wednesday or later than that; food is scheduled to start on Monday, May 4th. We will see. We are counting down the days until I get to eat (12 more days!).

In addition to all the responsibilities of taking care of me; my honey will have to give me shots under the skin twice a day. I'm not exactly sure what the shots are for, but I think to counter the digestive juices that could give me stomach ulcers from not eating. The nurse at the hospital also told me that it also helps to reduce the fistula or infections. I sure hope and pray that my colon and intestines will heal. When I am able to drink fluids; I plan to include drinking Aloe Juice. The Aloe Juice should help my intestines and colon to heal at least in my mind it will. What the hell, I can even do some meditation exercises in order to convince myself that I am indeed strong as hell!) I can get through this.

I have all kinds of yummy foods in the house (to tempt me) that I really, really wish I could eat but anytime I feel like eating; I can go on a walk with Miss Blue Belle or try to think of the most disgusting thing I can think of just so that I won't eat. It kind of reminds me of that one author that I studied in college "Franz Kafka". He had a form of stomach cancer or throat cancer for which he could not eat; he basically starved to death but he wrote some brilliant pieces about what he endured "Metamorphosis" and the "Hunger Artist". There are many different theories as to how he died but in many books they determined that he died of tuberculosis. I feel the throat or stomach cancer really reflects all that he had written about although it may not be true; he did starve to death ultimately. I know this hunger feels as if I am starving to death, but I know I won't die!)

UPDATE (Thursday, April 23rd): The teaching session went fantastic and my honey really is a natural. He could be a nurse; I made fun of him a little but told him I would never ever call him "nurse Focker" but he was amazing. I'm so incredibly proud of him. No photos just yet but he has another teaching session later on tonight which I plan to remember to snap a photo, download and post right here. The contraption that my feeding bag comes is just like a back pack and is stored in there and then hung from an IV pole.

Here's to my recovery! I plan to take more time off in order to heal more appropriately. My return date to work will be June 21st, Summer Solstice. I wanted my return to work to be magical and this will provide me plenty of time to heal after my nephostomy is taken out. 2 weeks of recovery from that should be sufficient. I have 6 weeks of having to deal with this nephostomy and my brother is also planning to visit. I have not seen him since October 2005. I'm so excited!)

Almost forgot to mention that my father will be visiting in 2 weeks to help my honey take care of me. Must enjoy everyday no matter what even though I am in the hospital. I am getting plenty of homework done even though the class may already be finished; I still have to finish the book no matter what. Start something; must finish or at least try to!)