WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The Next Snowboarding Adventure....

Well I'm working Monday - Thursday this week; with Friday being the day of the huge scan (do I need a shit bag or a puke bag?) I'm hoping and praying I need neither. I am hopeful for a miracle and that all of these vitamins will be the answer. The scan will be scary enough but I have a snowboarding adventure to think about but not that I won't be scared shitless of the results of this scan or how long will this scan actually take (2 hours or all day long)? Will I have time to wax my board, or clean up the house some more so that my visiting relatives don't think my husband and I live like pigs.

Kingsford Goes to the Beach

Hope you enjoyed the cute piggy video one of my carpool buddies sent me! Too cute not to include especially since my husband and I will be rushing to get our home cleaned in time for our family (brother, sister, niece, and mother= hubbies side) arriving from Wisconsin on Friday the 13th. We will be doing a Flashlight tour at midnight at the Winchester Mystery House that very night! We don't have much time to prepare and to plan our snowboard adventure; but I sure as hell need one!

I just started taking the vitamins just a couple of days a go because I got too impatient to wait to ask my doctor. Reason being is that I was mostly scared of the pain I have been feeling in my lower abdominal region and just took things into my hands. I'm just not ready for surgery just yet and things are starting to feel better although I have been having a few restless nights in a row (Sunday night and Monday night) of waking up every 20-30 minutes to go to the bathroom and waking up in a puddle of sweat. Yes, it all scares the shit out of me (really shit was coming out of me all night long = that's actually good news!) At least it was coming out; to be quite honest and I really have become more accepting of my funky body functions which are not so easy to understand; especially for me. In the meantime of experiencing them; I do try my best to not focus on them (because in all honesty it does scare the living shit out of me); I try breathing exercises, even denial of even having this disease, dreams, and hopes just to help me get by.

Some side effects I have been somewhat worried about lately is the heartburn (it hasn't gotten much worse) but there is the addition of more gas in my stomach. It's not painful gas but more or less heartburn pain. Sometimes I am able to pass gas (very rarely= I even strain to get out a little pathetic pooooof) but I do have to watch it or else it's a shart!) but most of the time I have been burping (man I have I been letting those go and loud they are!); especially at home. I've actually been having loads of fun burping at my honey, laughing as he tries unsuccessfully to out burp me! Yeah they are loud!

I don't usually burp as loud as possible at work - sometimes in the bathroom I might let one go if no one else is around; but most of the time I try to silently. These burps have been heavy duty (super loud) stinky burps which usually smell like something acid-y that I must have eaten previously (sometimes up to 2 days prior or more). This is worrisome and makes me almost loose faith that my intestines just might be failing as my doctor had been guessing. Could my doctor be right but I really do hope he is dead wrong. I still have faith, but the fear is really hard to shake.

Just to change the subject of the loud stinky burps

One cool thing I saw this morning on my way to work I saw a full rainbow that extended from the San Carlos hills over to my work (all the way over highway 101). It was magnificent and I made a wish that these vitamins will work; the power of the mind and prayers. I just need to get my immune system strong enough to kill those S.O.B. Cancer cells and for my intestines to heal on their own. One friend of mine suggested I get the Pacman application installed on my iPhone so that I could zone out and gobble up cancer cells. What a fantastic idea! Die cancer cells! Die!

Back to this Colorado storm that's happening; California is finally getting some much needed rain which also means that since this storm is originating from Colorado; the Sierra's will be getting lots of excellent powder for me to play in this weekend. Yes, we are planning another snowboard Adventure in which we will be leaving early, early Sunday morning for Kirkwood Mountain Resort in South lake Tahoe. I'm hoping to enjoy at least 2 - 3 days of fun powder! Well actually the energy level I have is amazing.

Every time we go snowboarding I feel absolutely wonderful for several days and the exercise and fresh air must make that cancer completely miserable. Serves it right too; because this weekend the S.O.B. better note that I have plenty more days in which to make it miserable. Get the F*&@# out of my body!

Life is so wonderful to be feeling so much pain sometimes (it's not all the time). I don't feel it now but sometimes I do and its so great to be able to do something about that pain. It's there still when I do something about the pain but at least I have this plant which enables me to also do other things to get my mind of of the pain. It's the reality of this disease which should have a cure.

Now for the political portion of my blog.

I'm very hopeful of this new administration and each day I am relieved when I read that he is doing something about the wrong that is going on (people loosing jobs, laws that or stipulations that were passed wrongly) and so much more. He is making right so many things that I believe in especially protecting animals and nature. People will finally be working and that's a good thing. See I only read the good news and if it's bad (TV=off),

Rich people and poor people all pay taxes and we should all be paying an equal share as far as income that we have to live off of and I'm so relieved that taxation will once again become fair. You have to work your share and pick up your own weight. That rich dude in the big house in Los Altos or Los Gatos will be paying the same percentage as my husband and I pay; finally. It costs money to have more money and that's life. I just want what I do and earn to not be wasted.

I'm OK paying a little more in taxes as long as my taxes go towards making my country better and helping others to get good jobs or health coverage. I do know how important health coverage is and there is nothing wrong with having it. My husband and I make no where near $250,000 together and we qualify for a cut in taxes which is a good thing but even if we had to cough up more; I'm all for bettering my country. I would rather have people working than not working and getting unemployment staying at home. His campaign was certainly run successfully and why could he not run our country with that much success? He is basing much of this budget on the New Deal that Roosevelt passed getting our ancestor's out of the Great Depression. I have faith and I intend to keep it!)

Healthcare reform is also in the works and so is stem cell which really gives me tons of hope. So much hope to look forward to and yes there are many who are praying for failure as sick as that is but mostly for their careers in that they hope America will fail. We do ultimately survive hard times; they just make you tougher and more resourceful. Here's to all of us working to make our Country great again! That's the hope I am talking about and all of us working together!)

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

The contents of this blog including all images, (except images from third parties) and the name "Shopping Kharma - what comes around goes around" belong and copyrighted to C. Jayne Armstrong 2008-2010
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