WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

A New Tumor called Whitman

I hope and pray that my blog posting does not offend any of you; I mean most of it in good humor and others are just wondrous .  As you do know I am all and for the legalization of Cannabis and feel that the drug wars must end. They are getting way too violent; even in my own neighborhood; I would love to take the seediness out of drug dealing and just make it boring and extremely unprofitable.  The drugs could be tested and regulated and not having people use battery acid and so many other kinds of deadly ingredients which are doing who knows what to our environment and not to mention the addicts.  Tax costs alone could pay for Rehab and Education.

I watched one of those documentaries on one of these cable stations about Meth.   It does make you feel that Prohibition back in 20's is exactly what this Drug War today is.  I'm all for making drugs legal for Adult Use by first  making drugs  safer and not so much of that aggro side effects which cause people to become dangerous and scary; many people on chemical drugs such as meth are very scary and I have walked by many which made me feel very uneasy and unsafe.  I'm fighting for my life and this crazy person  near me might be eying robbing me and seemingly on a very dangerous drug could very well over power me even kill me and not think a thing about ending an innocent person's life.   Yes,  I do love my neighborhood and I never have to drive any where but sometimes the Crazies will come of the wood work.  I found this video to be very interesting and why I question Prohibition on all drugs and of course this failed Drug War. 

Well; I personally don't feel that politics is at all in Good Kharma; especially here, but politicians are like cancer; many lie and cheat and steal; and they make quite greedy souls; not that any Hurst is equipped with a U-Haul for all their most prized possessions once they decide to leave this earth.   Many people act as if their possessions are worth more than a human life; like Money? OK that is something I will never even comprehend to understand. I hope my blog will help many prioritize what is most important about living and leaving a legacy.

Cancer is a disease for which I feel has united so many lives and has proved that when fighting in numbers; we can beat.  Each year these Relay for Life events bring communities together and honor those survivors and those whom we will never ever forget. This is the time of year for the walks and fun raisers for more cancer Research.  I would love to have Research on Cannabis and Cancer; I feel there is a key in there somewhere.  

I meet survivors from all over the world and it really does remind me that my life is affecting so many others in so many ways by how I fight this disease.  It also got me thinking about Conspiracy Theories that I have read and seen all over the internet; and that perhaps so many succumb to Heart Disease and Cancer (yet we don't really seem all that surprised that it's that many people dying in the US each year and in other countries; some countries don't even have it and I would love for us to study as to why this is true?  Is there really such thing as Population Control?  A circle of life for humans?  Maybe War is like Population control too?
OK back to my new tumor; (hope to get rid of it somehow); anyway its growing on my back and it does stab me in back quit a bit sometimes; it feels kind of like a dagger; tumors can be very painful for those who have them growing on them such as I.  I will show you  Meg Whitman (named after Backstabbing Meg Whitman is up in arms with the Nurses unions in fighting to take away mandatory breaks (I have been in a hospital and I for one know for a fact; that nurses do in fact work very, very, very hard.  I value nurses as I value my life.  (I'm not very trusting of many politicians) and I don't feel we should be drilling on our fragile CA shores; there are lots of Cancer Fighting plants growing in those areas that I don't feel we should taint. or kill with out researching them first to see if they really do possess the healing powers.    RESEARCH! RESEARCH! RESEARCH!  A cure is needed!)  

Her ads are very insulting and throwing many people under the bus; just tactics that I don't wish to see or hear for so many months of my life; many of her ads don't check out; maybe a few facts here and there; but stretching of the truth "why hell yeah!".   I'm not into the backstabbing in any one; I could never allow any of my loved ones to suffer in pain as I do; it's all worth it when I see what makes my heart flutter; this wonderful man who loves me no matter what; no matter what; he is there for me.   Anyway, onward with my fight of Whitman the tumor.  Here she is right now; just a baby back stabber as you will see in the video.

This photo is what I call "Love".  Here is my caring loving husband doing what he does to keep me alive for as long as he can.    He does so much each and every day.  We love each other more than life itself and as long as I am breathing; I am able to help him as he helps me; whether it be some light laundry, cooking, cleaning, and just loving him.

This has been a very tough time for both of us.  What we are facing ahead is the fear of the unknown; will my intestines heal?  If they don't there is a chance I might have a limited amount of time left.  This proves to all that you have to make the most of every moment in life that you can and think of it.

All married couples should be there for each other regardless.  Marriage is very sacred to me;  I for one don't feel that gay people getting married is going to hurt my marriage in any way.   What believe in for any marriage is Love, Respect, Communication, and Honor for each other.    In fact; love is stronger than what most people believe and I feel strongly that my love for my honey has kept me alive for much longer than what most doctors could have ever predicted.

I am also very happy that Prop 8 was regarded as Unconstitutional which it really is.  I feel that it is very, very wrong to mix Religion and Politics; in fact its very Sacrilegious to do so?  I don't trust the Mormon Church as all funding went to deceiving so many lives and I feel that those millions they spent in order to mislead many Californian Voters could have been spent on helping fund Research for childhood diseases, families who have lost everything, or those who are drowning in medical debt due to their lack of insurance, creating new jobs; so many things that could have helped others but instead is deceived.  How is that legal that they be able to raise money in order to deny rights to others?

I have met so many loving couples who I for one wish them many happy years together..  They deserve health insurance just as I do while I fight my battle.  It's sad that many of these couples are unable to cover each other on any insurance policy and I have met quite a few even in support groups that can't cover each other while the other works their tail end of and then is also the caretaker.  Some jobs do offer coverage for Civil Unions and I'm thankful to so many who are able to put themselves in the shoes of others and question "am I am being fair to this person?  Do I know this person that I am denying rights to?  Yesterday was a happy day for many.    I have met so many of these couples  in the chemo areas of the hospital and even in radiation.  I will never forget this

My husband and I we walk the miles (our wedding song "Thank You" by Led Zeppelin) of what ever we have to conquer together.  I'm so very proud of him and his abilities in taking good care of me.  Anyway, enough about my back stabbing tumor "Meg Whitman".  or maybe plain old "Meg"?  Please those of you with that first name; to be sure; we are not talking about you; those with hearts of gold and full of love!) Not any of you!   I can't just call it  plain old  "Whitman" because I know some very, very, very loving and peaceful Whitman's and backstabbing is the last on their agenda.  They are full of love and very good souls; another wonderful love story I got to see at my job.  I love all of those happy wonderful families who have all shown me how much love they have for me.

I recently lost a great internet friend who also was battling Ovarian Cancer; I had mentioned her on my blog many times before for giving me the strength that I needed to get through the humps of all    these surgeries and infections?  She had 2 Nephostomy Bags in her kidneys and was able to internalize one as I was too.  I still have a stint in my right ureter but she was so graceful about having to deal with what she had to deal with as far as the Canadian health Care System.  She was covered but the coverage didn't seem so great; she did get hospitalized and each and every time so much was done to save her life.  She had to endure so many scary things like clots in her legs (and deadly ones at that), she left behind a young son (about 5 years old) who was so sharp and he loved his mommy.   How I feel for this young family.  Her husband was another typical love story of another man who loves and cares for his wife through out and till the end.  God Bless Him.   Becky faught this disease long and hard for about 5 years and now she has her wings.  I sure hope she is smiling down at me.  May you Rest in Peace Becky!  I love you!

There have been some other deaths of other friends online from this deadly disease.  For some reason; this has been a very deadly month.  I almost lost it in the hospital last week.  I was so scared of dying there.   I am so glad to be out. It is amazing to be out; but the reminder that I am very sick is my weakness and the pain I feel when I try to eat. I'm still in need of weight gain but it's hard not knowing if my intestines are really working.  No more popcorn for me!

Meg is featured in the video portion of my Blog.  Tonto just got finished with his portion.   Each of my pets are also featured on my blog.

Peace and Love to all of you!  May there a be a cure in this lifetime!

OK AND this portion from Tonto!  Coming Soon!  Please come back to see Tonto in Action!

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Melissa said...

I agree with you, that Marijuana SHOULD be legal for those that need the relief of the pain that you are experiencing. I will place you in my prayers! You have an awesome outlook!


Susan said...

Yaaay, I'm glad to hear that Palin is shrinking! I hope BOTH Palins and BOTH Whitmans will go away *permanently and forever*

You are a truly beautiful woman in every sense of the word, Jayne. You continue to inspire me to appreciate life, and to be a better person, in a way that all that church stuff never could.

stipeygirl75 said...

Thank you thank you for this inspiring blog entry!!! I have fibromyalgia, migraines, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome and Chiari Malformation. As I get worse I am always humbled when I meet others who are even worse off. I have to be grateful for the things I CAN do (instead of worrying about the things I can't)! Attitude makes such a big difference. Peace and Love back at you! I loved seeing Tonto walk - I am also a crazy cat lady with 2 cats (Maya and Sapphire) and 1 dog named Ruby. I talk to them all the time like that - not sure if they understand me or they think I'm just babbling. Heh heh :) I hope your intestines are able to rest and that they are back to functioning soon!

- Sarah

TC said...

You make my lack of a convienent bathroom and the extreme heat down here in Laredo where we are look like what it is, just a passing problem....I'm with Susan, hope Palin goes away and Whitmans too, the names tickle me to no end!!

Kim said...

As for Conspiracy Theories... it's amazing that you are allowed to eat as much junk food as you want, until you are so obese that it kills you. But you are not allowed to smoke marijuana.

Ok, I agree, smoking is not good for you either, oh, smoking is allowed as well... go figure.

Like you say: some things are not researched, and I for one wonder why.

All my hugs!

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

The contents of this blog including all images, (except images from third parties) and the name "Shopping Kharma - what comes around goes around" belong and copyrighted to C. Jayne Armstrong 2008-2010
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