WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.

This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.

This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!

Monday, February 2, 2009

My Honey is gone all week:(

Oh how I miss him so! Can I make it the whole week with out my honey? Anyway, I had to go to work today and get some much needed training; so I will take another day off this week; haven't figured out which one I can; perhaps this Friday. The class I had today was pretty much all day and I almost got to have a good bye lunch with my honey (he left for Wisconsin today for his Grandfather's funeral). He wasn't able to make it up for lunch and I tried so hard to not cry because I didn't get to say good bye to him.

He knew he would need to go and apparently he needed to leave right away today. We talked and talked about him going and I supported him seeing his family. Because of my sickness, I feel so horrible that he has not gone to see them in several years. I haven't been back to see my own family since Nov. 2005.

I'm due but I just can't stand the stress of traveling and what if I'm in severe pain and can't use my medicine? Waiting in those long, long lines, security, and the whole process can be so demeaning and can really make you feel like a second class citizen. It's like we are all cows and out the window our Constitution. It's as if we all were responsible for those attacks. I know they have to be careful and times have changed. It's used to not be this bad but luckily I have had family come visit me; I really miss my brother like crazy and have not seen him since my last visit. I can't believe it has been 3 years without seeing my brother; almost torturous. Talking on the phone is one thing, but just being around someone is something else!)Link

My husband and I at least got to go on a fun bike ride yesterday prior to the Super Bowl. We stopped at an Army Surplus store and a few Super Bowl Parties. I had met the manager of that Steven's Creek Surplus just before Christmas and told him of my situation. We actually talked for a while about Cancer, politics and so much more. Anyway, he recognized me and saw us looking at the doo rags (a rag to wear just under your helmet). He gave me a bag full of doo rags- all colors. It was so cool and they are all really awesome doo rags. He was giving them to children at Christmas and we seemed to appreciate them even more. What comes around goes around!)

OK, now back to work & the funny story. I normally refrain from talking about work here, but since I had such a great laugh; I just can't resist. Well, instead of my husband coming up for a good bye lunch, I had a nutritious lunch; a vitamin shake, a fresh juice from the cafeteria, and some cooked vegetables. I was enjoying my lunch with a few of my co-workers including this young researcher who was trying out a vegan diet. It was mostly just us girls and him.

Apparently he has tried a few diets (2 weeks at a time) and this one too, it had only been 2 weeks (that's actually pretty good). I may have ruined it for him. Anyway, he was talking about the diet and how he was planning to eat all this tofu and soy stuff. I started thinking about why I can't handle a whole lot of soy (emulates estrogen and could make my cancer grow like crazy); but anyway, I blurted out (uncontrollably, just like me) "doesn't eating lots of soy, make your boobs get big?". With that, we all (except him), burst out laughing. I think I laughed for 10 minutes strait and tried not to for the rest of my class which was another 4 hours. One of my other co-workers had told me that man boobs are called Moobs. Sometimes funny things happen and I can laugh about them for days.

Anyway, when I got home from work, I took Blue Belle out for a few walks, did some much needed house cleaning and tried to sort out problems with this blog. I had changed the template a few times (even had a pretty one for a few days) and it's still kinda sorta not working. I had to change it back to that same boring "scribe" template. I turned off the Adsense with hopes that those with Internet Explorer can once again view my blog. Sometimes the Adsense acts up and in Internet Explorer it just can't pull up those pages. It will get stuck and it seems likes its flashing or the screen is flashing (it makes these noises), and then it just can't pull up the page. I can always pull it up on my Macs at home and even on my iPhone. Here's to my blog not being boring!)


l'optimiste said...

I am using IE7 on a pc, and have never had any problems with your blog?

I hope the week zooms by! At least it's Tuesday already! ;o)

Mr Crowley said...

What a wonderful blog. You must be a strong person to be able to share this with the world. I hope I will be able to do the same as I begin to tell my story. My best to you......Mrs Crowley

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My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.

I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.

Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.

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