WARNING: Some of the Content here may be Objectionable to some. I have this blog labeled as "Adult Only" as a common courtesy for those who may easily be offended by Adult topics such as the Truth, Down to Earth topics, realities of living with Ovarian Cancer and/or any life threatening disease that goes along with it; Sexuality, Medicinal Cannabis, Profanity, and of course plenty of unpleasant body functions are also discussed here. This is a very tough battle for which I don't intend to hold anything back on what I am facing.
This blog is very personal and comes from the heart of a real fighting cancer patient who wishes nothing more than to live for all of those I love my own will to live, and my love of life. While sometimes I might be on heavy medication (prescribed by my doctor) and occasionally I might write about things or subjects that one may never even think about or consider; so please consider that as well. Yes; whacked out things might even be found here; but I mean everything in all good intentions.
This blog is not at all intended for the faint hearted, those who lack a sense of humor, have no idea what down to earth means, greedy mean people, and/or those who don't know how to share the world with others, and especially those who are unable to easily put themselves into the shoes of others. This blog is mostly about my journey of living my life in the best ways that I can under the Golden Rule and appreciating all of the GOOD KHARMA that comes my way! Never take anything in this world for granted; especially family and friends!
I ask this question myself daily. What's most important? Are those bills that never seem to go away, are those most important, the news, a TV show that has you sucked in away from your loved ones, getting to work on time, filling up your tank, things you may have or could have said?
I am hoping that after you read about what I am enduring, you at least reflect on how lucky you are and to be quite honest, we are all lucky in our own ways.
As I watch Caesar, the Dog Whisperer talking about living in the Now, it really makes the most sense and he is right about the importance of right now. Enjoying the time with loved ones or just having great experiences, great conversations, and enjoying the present!
Imagine life living like your dog does in the right now. Not worrying at all about the past, just on how to improve the future? Wouldn't this world be a much better place. Of course we learn from past mistakes, but we have to move on and enjoy our time here.
How do I feel right now? I often ask myself that question daily. If I am in pain, I deal with it but I refuse to stress out over results of my CAT scan (I hate a CAT scan on Monday, July 21st). They may find that the cancer has spread to more places but for me, I'm alive right now.
I felt the importance of this CAT scan to mostly find out why I still can not fully digest food (still after 3 months) and it is due to my intestines narrowing from scar tissue or over time. I just hope that from these results, we can find a way to fix me. For right now, I have to eat once ever other day and sometimes I just can't help it and I try to eat just like a normal person, but boy do I suffer in pain when I do. It's like I am getting taught a tough lesson each time. It is getting easier because I feel pain when I walk by some really delicious foods, such as cheese stuff and more.
Complex foods are a real challenge for me to digest. My intestines make so much noise when I do eat something complex like a sandwich, pizza, or a danish. It sounds exactly like bad pipes and I can watch as my stomach swells in pain as it roars in the attempts to get the food to pass through. I just want a solution and not to have to suffer in pain much longer although the pain level is under control most of the time.
My techniques and treatments work simply for me and may not produce the same results for others. Cancer is a very tricky disease in which it is very different in everyone it touches. No two cancers are the same just as we humans are not the same. What works for me may not work for others.
I love life and expect to live for as long as I can. I intend to use those treatments that do work for me which includes medicinal cannabis. I'm still alive with this disease over 7 years later because of this miracle plant and as long as I have my medicine available; I intend to survive many more years. I hope one day the Federal Government will eventually grow up and be led by true leaders who represent the people and not just coorporations; real people who live by the Golden Rule "treat others how you would want to be treated". I also hope the Government of the US can finally learn to admit that it has made a mortal mistake in making this life saving plant which is provided by GOD and does indeed have the ability to provide all of us with food, fuel, clothing, shelter, and medicine; a mistake that have made is that it is illegal. Yes, it was a mistake out of greed, ignorance, and racism that this miracle plant is illegal. This is a confirmed fact and we should all know and face it.
Cannabis is not at all harmful and in fact quite the opposite. Perhaps our economy can once again grow as it has in the turn of the century by making this life saving plant legal once again.